The mom-high

November 16, 2020

Reflection: Being a mother is forever-equal parts ecstasy and agony.

Today I am grateful for... my son.

Challenge: Ride the mom-high

This one’s for my mamas. Do you ever just hold your baby(s) and internally weep? You know what I’m talking about. Those moments right before bedtime, when they rest their tiny, innocent little heads on your shoulder and you realize, for the briefest second, that this is what bliss feels like? Even after the longest of days, there’s something magical about that sweet little cheek resting on your shoulder. And in that moment, you tiptoe along a peak of both ecstasy and agony. The ecstasy is easier to identify with because it fits into that box of the inexplicable mom-high that everyone talks about, but nobody truly has the words for.

And yet, the agony is much harder to wrap my head around. We’ve all experienced love, and the pain that love brings. But when it’s your baby....it’s. just. different. This pain is fueled by a depth of unconditional, compassionate care and love that can’t be replicated. No one can replace a mother’s love. It’s fueled by equal parts nature and nurture. And I would even say that it’s fueled by fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of the unlikely. Fear of losing this perfect moment forever. And fear of majorly screwing something up for this sweet, perfect, little angel of a human. (Seriously....there are days when I question how on earth I was blessed to be chosen as my son's mother!) But at the end of the day, it’s moments like these that give us the perfect opportunity to live and breathe our gratitude. To just be present, and indulge in the bliss. Because as we all know, that moment will end. We will lay their sweet souls down for a good night’s rest, and we will step back into the mayhem of our lives. But in that moment, we can hold onto it....just for a few seconds longer, and thank God for this incredible opportunity to be their mother.

XO

SS

P.S. A favorite clip of mine from Amanda Kellar with a reflection on parenting. (grab your tissues)