Soul smiles

April 29, 2021

Reflection: I’m not a perfect mom, but I’m perfect for Calvin

Today, I’m grateful for: soul smiles

Challenge: What sweet things has your child done lately that made you smile?

To my fellow mamas out there, do you think there’s some truth to how some people say you can never understand how much your parents loved you until you have a child of your own? There’s definitely this unique depth to the love and passion one feels for a child. A connection deep within your soul that you can’t quite articulate. We love our children so fiercely, even through the days (or weeks) where we may get little-to-nothing “in return”. It is life’s greatest example of selfless, unconditional love.

The patience, tenacity, endurance and resilience it takes to care for a child, especially a small child, is indescribable. But every so often, in the moments you least expect it, you find yourself crippling beneath the smallest of interactions with your child. The first time they lock in to your gaze, or take hold of your finger, or their first smirky-smile, first giggle, (or even the first time they sleep through the night 😅).

These mini-milestones offer refuge in times of deep trial and they shift as our babies grow, but the soul-smiles (as I like to call them) that they cause remain. Here’s a few recent interactions with Calvin that gave me some of those “soul-smiles”:

-His curiosity and amazement in watching the tractors plant crops behind our house

-His obsession with his “cozy coup” car and how adorable he looks when he climbs in, shuts the door and grabs hold of the steering wheel like a grown man

-The way he proudly said “boo-boo” as he pointed to his first-ever scraped knees from school

-The way that he eats blueberries so aggressively fast as if he waited another second, he may never see another blueberry again

-Watching him attempt to put his shoes on by himself

These are just a few of many examples where he brings me flickers of joy in my days. He’s certainly not always this sweet, and I am certainly far from the “perfect” mom, but I’d like to think of these moments as validation that I’m perfect for him. I’m grateful for these mini-milestones and the soul-smiles that they trigger.

XO

SS