May 31, 2021
Today, I’m grateful for: Just another day
Today officially marks one full day of being at home after spending the last few days at the hospital. As much as I expected things to feel more “normal” once we got home, it actually just feels weirder. At the hospital, you have no choice but to just sit and find ways to pass the time. But at home, it’s like my whole world is moving around me now while I sit idly in the eye of the storm.
This glorified version of bedrest means mentally, I am still aware of all the things I normally would be doing in any given scenario to care for my family and household, but physically, I am stuck. And if you know me well, you know the unique kind of personal hell this dynamic creates for me. And Calvin certainly doesn’t understand why things are different. My mom heartstrings tug simultaneously as he pulls on my fingers trying to get me to go play. And I have already perfected the stiff-arm which comes in particularly handy during his sprint-dives onto the couch.
I feel guilt as I witness my husband managing every bit of our life. And the general sense of “blah” is an ever present cloud hanging over my head. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t Google various forms of “how to not get depressed when on bedrest” today... 🤦🏼♀️
As challenging as these next several (hopefully) weeks are going to be, I take each day as a blessing. Every second, minute, hour, day, and week are significant milestones. As we continue to navigate this new normal, I am so grateful for “just another day”. Only 59 more to go....
On a lighter note, we managed to squeeze in a little mini family BBQ to top off our long weekend. The fresh air did us all some good and Calvin, per usual, loved every second of being out “shide”. I have a feeling the “fresh air” is going to be one of my saving graces for a while...Now accepting suggestions for any seated, low-risk activities!
XO
SS
Commentaires