November 24, 2020
Reflection: What abilities do I have that I am grateful for?
Today I am grateful for... my physical strength and abilities.
Challenge: Consider how you define a healthy and strong body. What is keeping you from getting there, and/or maximizing that?
I had a wild experience late last week. My coworker and I were having a walking meeting outside, at a local park. We'd passed an older man in a wheelchair, and exchanged smiles as we passed one another. About ten minutes and a couple laps around the park later, I saw him approaching the intersection to cross the street. In what felt like slow-motion, I watched him hit a small pothole, and somersault out of his chair. We took off running toward him.
“Are you ok?!” I said, as I approached him and evaluated the situation.
“I think so...” he said, looking himself over with a look of frustration and disappointment on his face.
“Do you want me to call an emergency service?” I said, as I walked into the street to defer any oncoming traffic from our situation.
“No...” he said.
“Do you want us to help you into your chair?” I asked?
He looked at each of us one-by-one, and with a look of defeat, he said, “I don’t think you guys can do it...”
In that moment, a woman pulled up and stopped.
“Do you guys need help?” she asked.
My coworker and I paused, both still in shock.
“I’m an ER nurse...”, she continued.
[What a Godsend!]
“YES!” we replied in unison.
She got out and approached the man, evaluating him and asking if he wanted to come in and get checked out.
“No, no...” he continued. “Let’s get my chair.”
The three of us, together, hoisted the man back into his chair. Another once-over from the nurse, and he rolled away with no more than a raspberry to show for it.
I’ve played these moments over and over in my mind the past several days. So many questions, thoughts and emotions.
I sure hope he’s ok. What was he really feeling in those moments? I wish I knew his name and his story. Could I have made him feel more comfortable? Should I have reminded him that these things happen? Was he frustrated because of the fall? Or because it took three strong women coming together to help him? Did I thank the ER nurse? I think I did. I wonder what her name was. I’m sure glad we were all there. I hope none of them were exposed to COVID...and yet, even if they were and I knew it, would that really have changed my instinctual response to run and help?
So many questions that I’ll probably never have answers to. But this experience was a slap-in-the-face reminder to be grateful for my health, all the abilities I have and how much of an impact that has on my life. It reminded me of the time shortly after my son was born. We’d endured a very difficult labor and birth (a story for another day), which left me bedridden for almost 3 days, and led to a very difficult postpartum period with a long healing process. I remember feeling so defeated, so helpless, so frustrated, so disappointed. All I wanted was my strength back, my health back and to be able to do all the things a new mom wants to do.
Of course, I made it through. I did regain my strength back, and I'm back to having the privileges of choice afforded to able-bodied humans. But for this man, paralyzed in his chair for the rest of his life, he doesn’t have the same choices I do. Gratitude for our abilities has the potential to influence so much more than a peaceful moment. It can enable a tougher workout. It can bring patience in moments of frustration. It can bring mindfulness to mundane tasks. Today, I work and live for this man, whom I’ll never truly know, but who’s impact has been profound.
XO
SS
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